Dose of Delusion
Two professionals serving up witty banter, unfiltered opinions, and contagious laughter. Join us in Dose of Delusion as we dissect life's absurdities and navigate the world with humor and touch of delusion.
Dose of Delusion
Holiday Cheers and Digital Dating Tears in the Year-End Roundup
Jay and AJ recount personal experiences during business trips and holiday festivities. The focus is on amusing incidents, including a challenging hotel shower, hosting a corporate Christmas party, unconventional holiday feasts, and entertaining gift exchanges. They also explore family dynamics during work escapades and how families maintain holiday cheer despite distances. The discussion extends to personal love lives, touching on dating app mishaps and unexpected influences on romantic pursuits. The hosts share anecdotes of modern dating, from Grindr encounters to connections on apps like Be Real and Raw. The podcast also recommends "Messy Situations," a compilation of amusing life stories. The hosts invite listeners to close out the year with laughter, celebrating past adventures and looking forward to the stories that lie ahead in the coming year.
Hello, hello, hello and welcome back to your Dose of Delusion. It is me, yours truly, your host, jay, and I am sitting right across from the wow, self-centered, glamour-packing posing, been waiting seven minutes to get his lighting right. Quintessential, aj, aj, I haven't seen you in so long. Tell me everything. How are you?
Speaker 2:I'm good. I'm good. First of all, it's been forever and I haven't recorded it in our studio in a while.
Speaker 1:I know it's so funny that I rushed or both of us, we rushed to get this whole studio set up to record one episode and then live vacation vacation and work trips and everything, but we're back we're back now, Absolutely.
Speaker 2:It has been a while. How, actually? How was I'll pass, how was?
Speaker 1:your work trip. The work trip was chaotic, it was fun, it was seven days of straight work but I absolutely I mean, I love my job when it comes to that part of my job. But then I did take some PTO and extended my trip because where they do send me to go to work is also my hometown.
Speaker 2:I love that.
Speaker 1:So I spent a few extra days with the family and the parents and before I get into that circus, Wait, hold on.
Speaker 2:Yes, I actually want to recall, or I want to talk about how was the next hotel situation? Because the last time we spoke, you were very dramatic when you all you had to do was do top floor and wait for a fourth floor elevator.
Speaker 1:Let me just say this I have to preface this by saying that I don't typically get to pick my hotels. My employer picks them for us and the hotel that I switched rooms three times complained every step of the way I would have killed to go back to when I got to my second hotel.
Speaker 2:Oh no, I know, but tell me more.
Speaker 1:I walk into the lobby and it's a glamorous and it's big and it's fancy and they're super nice and friendly. And I was like, are you cool? Right away parks, like you're in the third building. I'm like, all right, they have a lot of luggage. Come here through the front elevators. I'm like, cool, and I had a lot of luggage. Yeah, and so I go to the front elevators and the further I get from the lobby, the getaway and getaway and get. So that was like by the like. It was like I, you know, I started in Dubai and ended in Baghdad.
Speaker 2:That's hilarious, ridiculous. So, and you know, I've actually seen where they do the remodel and they spend all their money on their lobby to trick people, because that's where all the photos are essentially, but it's like lobby and amenities and then like the room is still like 1972. Yeah.
Speaker 1:I mean I walk into my room and immediately I start sneezing and coughing. So the great dusty and mold. But right Whatever Um the shower situation, I don't understand why they do these big like protruding shower curtains that never hold any water in the floor is just a puddle, the tiles are loose, the toilet is running and I'm just like well, those are designed to have, like the two.
Speaker 2:Does it only have one shower curtain or is it two?
Speaker 1:It only has one. Oh wait, so you're telling me that the shower rod that curves out? Yeah, it's supposed to have a split curtain. Yeah, oh, no, not. That's not at all how it was. It was just one curtain and there was just water literally everywhere, but the inside of the tub it was like it has like the shower liner, and then it has like the decorative on the outside.
Speaker 2:That's what those are supposed to be. That's the problem.
Speaker 1:That's the problem. The curtain they use, I think, is not long enough, long enough to be extended outward, I see, so it doesn't quite meet the bottom. I'm just like, well, if you guys want the water damage, and that's probably where the mold is coming from.
Speaker 2:That's why you're itchy and like coffee.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so that wasn't good. Luckily it was only there for three nights and I couldn't wait to check out which I did.
Speaker 2:You know, your pain in sorrow just causes me so much joy though I imagined it was. Oh my God, you're so sweet, I'm so lucky to have you in my life.
Speaker 1:But you know so the end of my workshop is actually pretty great. I ended up, we finalized our entire week with our Christmas party annual Christmas party and. I hosted. I MC it again. That is so much fun. It is so much work. I don't know if we've ever like MC'd a four hour event where you're on stage, on mic, the entire time, but let me tell you why it's my favorite thing to do. Tell me when you are hosting an event and you have a personality like you and I do have they expect the jokes.
Speaker 1:They expect you to essentially be rude to people and I get to cut people down and just say the most vile things and everybody else sees it as absolute humor and I fucking love it and that's all I did for four and a half hours straight. I love that I'm talking like my senior senior bosses would walk in and be like hey, can I get you anything?
Speaker 1:Everybody turned their attention to someone, so can I get you a beverage? Can I get you a plate of food? Can I get you a watch, since you're two hours late? You know stuff like that, and it was just literally so much fun. And I finished that the next morning, checked out the hotel and then I went to Family Hell my mom and dad's. I don't want to call it hell, but I did go to my mom and dad's house. But before I get into that, what did you do this week?
Speaker 2:Okay, let me think. I think when we last spoke oh, I had a very dear good friend of mine in town and I was rushing to end our episode because I was actually going to go meet up with him for drinks and that was my friend. Brian was visiting from out of town. He lives in Washington state and we met several years ago on a vacationing together on a little group, a K, that we went to and he was dating this girl that was best friends with my bestie, I know whatever.
Speaker 2:So that's where we met. The trip was to Key West and we just like morning by the pool, we were having coffee and he was working from his trip and he actually in Chit Chat oh, when's your birthday? What do you do? That kind of stuff we share the same birthday. No, way.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I'm just like April 11th, that's correct, 411. And he's exactly one year younger than me. So we immediately became besties and like brothers and we've just like. It's been over a decade now that we've been friends and he, since he, lives in a completely different state. Whenever he does come to Texas he makes it a point to obviously always see me, and his sisters and mom live in Austin and when he drives down to San Antonio it's to see little me. So we had like dinner and drinks and hung out. So it was really really nice seeing him and then met up with I think I went out I don't really recall that was Thursday and then Friday went out and then Saturday was like a bit of a blur, I believe.
Speaker 2:But I've just been like my weekends. I just like want to forget about work because work's so stressful and I had a resin event I had to take care of on Sunday. So from Friday to Saturday let loose, had fun, and then Sunday morning went to go, do like coffee and donuts for the residents type of thing, and then just kind of like spent the rest of the day, you know, doing stuff.
Speaker 1:But work, work, work. Love that for you. I wish I could even try to match what you did, but I cannot. I already talked about how I just work and bust out of my ass for seven days, but once I finished work I got to go home and it was super nice, it was super fun, I was so happy to be back and I'm gonna say, my childhood home, as if I haven't been back in forever. But really I don't really get to. Every time I go back home for work I get so busy and luckily have very supportive parents who, you know, I want to say, follow in their footsteps, but they have worked in the same line of work before.
Speaker 1:So they understand and I'll go up or I'll drive into town, I'll bring my dog, I'll drop them off and say I don't care what you do, just keep them alive. And then I won't see them until the end of my trip, where I drive back to my house.
Speaker 2:Don't give them to the Amazon driver.
Speaker 1:That was one time and I will never let you forget it. It was between me and you.
Speaker 2:Exactly.
Speaker 1:And at the end of the work trip I'll just go home, pick up a hot plate of food, grab my dog and head back here to San Antonio. And they're very understanding, very supportive. So this time let me spend some time with them especially since. I'm not staying for Christmas. So when I told my mom I'm not staying for Christmas, she's like let me rearrange the whole schedule. Let me just ask Santa if we can have Jesus move his birth, because she did Christmas early.
Speaker 1:We did Christmas on Sunday afternoon so that I could be there we're talking the food, the meal, the presents, the whole shebang.
Speaker 2:How many plates of food did you?
Speaker 1:have? I only had one plate of food.
Speaker 2:I'm disappointed.
Speaker 1:You know what I was beyond stuffed. It was delicious.
Speaker 2:What kind of food did you all do for the holidays, like for Christmas?
Speaker 1:My mom will kill me for saying this, but it's fine, it's whatever, I don't care. She pissed me off. No, she bought her food, she ordered it all.
Speaker 2:She didn't cook, and no it was like barbecue, essentially.
Speaker 1:So it was like brisket, pork, mashed potatoes, mac and cheese coleslaw. She made a couple of other side dishes. I don't recall what they were. We had tamales and whatnot. So she's like I don't feel like lifting a finger, which, honestly, that woman needs a break. Yeah, but it was nice. She did something different, unique, for the gifts.
Speaker 2:Okay, I thought it was cute.
Speaker 1:I thought it was cool we had. My 10-year-old niece is with us as well, but she's kind of mature for her age, not that it matters. Instead of, just like everybody, go get your gifts and whatnot, she set up essentially a beer pong. Okay, and everyone took a turn and you couldn't go and get your gift until you made a cup. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:That's fine, so that really prolonged it, which was kind of neat. So instead of everybody opening their gifts and being done in seven minutes, it was a good hour, so we had to take her turns playing beer pong and that determined the order we got to go and get her gifts, so that was a lot of fun.
Speaker 1:And then she set up a second game of beer pong. Maybe she has a problem where she bought all these trash cans, these wire trash cans, and filled them with like just snacks and goodies and mini liquor bottles and just everything. And that was the second game we played, and whoever made it got it, and of course, we're like gift cards and cash.
Speaker 2:Have y'all done or have you seen where they like surround wrap like gift cards or like little gifts and presents and they wrap it into a ball and you wear like mittens or oven mitts and like?
Speaker 1:We did that here last year.
Speaker 2:Uh-huh, how was that?
Speaker 1:It was interesting, it was fun.
Speaker 2:I've seen it, excuse me, sorry. I've seen it in action, like on videos and stuff like that, and I'm just like no, no, no, no, I won't be doing that, it's good for groups and entertainment and games.
Speaker 1:There's nothing that I think I would do with like a family of. There were four, maybe six of us, five of us at my house, I don't even know, but when we did it here at our gift exchange within this friend group, there were like 25 of us there. So, yeah, it was appropriate for that event.
Speaker 1:It was a lot of fun, but it was specifically appropriate for that. I love that, but no, but otherwise we did that. We ate, we got our gifts. It was really neat. I did not buy a single gift for anybody. Oh, I did buy my mom a gift.
Speaker 2:I love that.
Speaker 1:But my mom bought everybody's gifts for everybody and then it was like a little, almost like a white elephant pretty much. She goes every gift I got. I know you guys will like, but it's not specifically for you.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah.
Speaker 1:So you're more than welcome to exchange or steal or whatnot.
Speaker 2:Oh, clever and interesting. I love that it was very neat. And then she changed everyone's schedule and stuff. Who went for you?
Speaker 1:I know. Believe it or not, this is a face a mother could love. Can you see the face I'm making?
Speaker 2:Look, I need Botox because you could see my confusion and anger, on my forehead.
Speaker 1:So you know, my mother is a blessing and also so much more I can't wait to hear. Okay. So now I am home and both my brothers are out of the house, so it's just me, okay? So I'll tell you what was nice, aj is I live alone here, so Like I'm responsible for all of the cleaning or cooking, or whatever.
Speaker 1:And it was so neat because I would like make some food and then, like I typically do, I cook, I eat, and when I'm all done I'll clean up and I'll cook and then I'll eat and I'll leave my empty plate next makes. I'm still working, I'll look up and that plate is gone. I'm gonna cook that's weird whatever. And then I go to clean up my pots and pans and, and they're clean and Every dish I left was picked up. And then I left the pile of clothes in the room I'm staying in and I come back and they're gone and then two hours later they're on my bed folded. I'm like this is nice. Where was it? Where were these parents when I was a teenager?
Speaker 2:Oh, oh the, the people that our parents are today. I, I hate so many quite like. Exactly where were they? Who are Invasion of the body, snatchers. I don't know who took over, but I'm glad they did Right, right.
Speaker 1:It was. I was so spoiled. Yeah, I mean I. I mean they had, they had my dog and I'm there now. Right, I'm no longer at work staying in hotels. I'm there now and my mom's like sneaking into the room to get my dog, to take him outside. You know, that way I don't have to wake up. Not that I have anything to do, yeah, you know what I mean. I was sit down and my dad's like do you need a blanket? Do you want something for your feet, do you?
Speaker 2:need this. Where's the remote? Do you want?
Speaker 1:you need the remote, do you want some water? And I'm like, oh my, oh my, it was so nice, so move back and hello oh why, Okay, all right, so one.
Speaker 1:It was really nice that my dad asked me if I need something for the first you know 18 seconds. But like, even today, I just got back on a town today. Listen to this is how much I care about you all, listener. I drove eight hours today a jr Rush here from work and I were recording. But even this morning when I'm packing up oh, I Mean he. It was like did you get a bag? Do you need this? Do I'm gonna start the car? That's so cute. But I was like at one point look that. I was like, dad, you've asked me eight questions in the last two minutes. I was like give me five minutes to think they love you, they're proud of you.
Speaker 2:They just want to make sure I.
Speaker 1:Have so many things to say now my mother is a mom, right and one. I Need to go get her checked for Alzheimer's because she will tell me the same story 18 times in a row. But you know, honestly, I know people who I know people have lost their mothers Right and all. I'll never forget this one time AJ, a very good friend of mine, co-worker, had just lost his mother, literally within weeks, and we're out to lunch, a group of us throughout the lunch on, mom calls me and she asked me something annoying that's mother's do, and I hung up and I was like, oh my gosh, she's so annoying. And my friend was like, at least you still have your mother.
Speaker 2:I was like oh shit.
Speaker 1:So with that said my mom, as much as it annoys me, I will have her tell. I'll let her tell me the same story. I never stop her over and over and over again, because I know there's one day that I'm gonna wish I could hear the repeated story over and over.
Speaker 2:And over again right.
Speaker 1:So it was so frustrating, but I still really loved it until she insulted me. She really insulted me, and then she got a laugh out of it too, like she knew what she was doing. She embodied.
Speaker 2:AJ, I have him tell me more.
Speaker 1:Actually, she did.
Speaker 2:Does she know me?
Speaker 1:She's listening to the product you're like you're like it's been too long stuff. Insult to Jay. Please do this on my back.
Speaker 2:I like willed her to.
Speaker 1:This is actually literally an insult for me. Let me tell you what happened, so I forgot how we got on the subject when I'm telling her about. Oh, I know what it was. I got an invitation from a co-worker to join some society. She's a part of now. We talked before about how sometimes we go to work. We do our job very well, but they're not our friends, right and I love this co-worker.
Speaker 1:She's super sweet and she hangs around a very elite circle in this community in this city and but I just don't know if I want to then diagram our lives that way just yet, right. So I'm telling my mother about this. I'm like, you know, I just got this, you know this text from someone, so and it would be great because you know she's always that gala, she would invite me to dinners and gallows and cocktails. I was like I want to go to a gala and I was like the gals would be so much fun. And I'm going on and on about gala's and she's like, well, it definitely won't be no Met gala, but I'm sure you'll have fun.
Speaker 1:I'm like, mom, it's a gala. And she's like I'm just saying it's not going to be the Met. And I'm like, well, of course not gonna be the Met. She's like, well, don't get too excited. I'm like, mom, just just be happy for me that I'm gonna go to gala's with the spurs players and their and their wives. And and she's like, well, it won't be the Met, so don't get too big, too too big for your britches.
Speaker 2:And I'm like, so I'm leaving in eight hours then was that was not for me, because I don't get jealous, and that was Um from jealousy.
Speaker 1:Could be not, could be, it definitely was um, but no, ultimately, you know, as annoying as my parents are in hearing them bicker and I can't solve the really bickering or play bickering, and my brothers weren't there to like you know, help me make fun of them as it was just me right.
Speaker 2:You said that's right. You guys always do that we team up on them.
Speaker 1:Oh, this time we chose my dad oh no, he's so sensitive.
Speaker 2:It was so much fun. Yeah, yes, we have to.
Speaker 1:No, I do okay, anyways, um, but another issue that I was having with being at home is okay, so obviously I would send not everybody, but I think the majority of us you know us being, you know the gay folk um are on grinder or are they dating apps? Right?
Speaker 2:okay, you logged in because you're out of town. Fresh meat blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Speaker 1:I actually haven't been on grinder in a while, and I want to say four days. No, I'm just kidding, no.
Speaker 2:I want to say two to three months okay, two to three months.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I hadn't been on it and I know it's been that long, if not maybe longer, because it was about a month ago that I got an email saying like over renewing your subscription. I'm like shit because I paid for it, okay, and I did you all right. One's up were you on. Grinder was the last time you.
Speaker 2:Okay, you were so, so I have. I can't even tell you when the last time I logged in right to it, um, but I'm pretty sure it's still on my phone, because I go have this like I'm gonna delete it and then I'll delete it and then I like get drunk and then one download it back and like I have that like sick, like relationship with it.
Speaker 2:I'm sure, thank you, it makes me feel better, but like I, I don't. I'm not paying for that shit. Not pay for any, that just get like a few more no, that's not why I paid for it.
Speaker 1:Oh, and that's why I wanted to ask you I pay for it for what? The main reason was that they have this incognito feature. Did they have that when you were on it? Oh, yes, yeah, so you can remain offline to everyone else, but you can still browse. I work, not that I not. Obviously I'm not closeted, not that I'm closeted by any means whatsoever but I do work in a very male driven, typically just a very masculine I'm like you know, so I do like to browse and see who's on there and.
Speaker 1:I'll do my little, you know, investigate, okay. Well, this person's on right now with no profile and there's four people in the office. This person left for lunch. That profile is on, no longer near me you know, okay, it must be that person. But I can do all of that when they can't see me perfect, because I know that they see me. They're going to block me because they're right closeted that other person is.
Speaker 1:That was the main reason why that makes sense. But let me tell you another reason that I think is worth paying for it the ads. Aj, I forgot about that. I've been paying for Grindr for a couple of years and when I realized it'd been months since I logged on, I'm like why am I spending 40 bucks a month on this?
Speaker 1:yeah, cancel the description oh my god, 40 dollars a month, yes, I know, for an app I wasn't even logging in too often, right? So I counted the subscription months ago. I log on now because I'm in a new city. Let's have a little fun, right? Oh okay, that's first of all. First of all, let's talk about this. I'm staying at mom and dad, so guess who's not hosting right?
Speaker 1:this guy right, so that's already incredibly frustrating. Um, but I can't even have a conversation. I'll get into like a hey, what's up? Hey, how are you? What do you look at?
Speaker 2:oh yeah, candy crush. You know what? Maybe that's why I've just been over it and I'm not gonna fucking pay for that shit. I just like no.
Speaker 1:I don't blame me because now, now I'm at the point, because then I was thinking well, maybe I should just pay the 10 dollars, get rid of the ads. I'm like fuck, no, like I'm sorry, dick is not worth 10 dollars.
Speaker 1:Right, exactly right, maybe, but not from grinder, definitely not from grinder, and I was it was just really frustrating because you know I would get into a conversation and then an ad would pop up and you can't really get rid of the ad. You would try to but you can't. And if you, if I now go your way around it because I did, I did figure something out. Okay, if one of these 30 or 45 second ads are playing and somebody messages you and you tap the notification, it'll go straight to the message to get rid of the ad. Cool, so you can like respond, I suppose. Okay, but the second you go back to the browsing screen, the ads back again. Okay, so freaking frustrating, wow. But then that got me thinking. I'm also on my phone.
Speaker 1:I have downloaded hinge and tender oh yeah, have you been on any of those?
Speaker 2:I um, I think I downloaded hinge and I have this feature on my phone where if I don't log into things, they just like auto, like remove oh, yeah, for memory, yeah, exactly, um, and I know I have a profile, but I can't even tell you the last of my logged in because it's no longer on my phone and I just you know I I'm just, I haven't been wanting to do anything serious like a dating app. So is plenty of fish still around, imagine I love.
Speaker 1:Oh my god, talk about a throwback. Yeah, what were you five when you were on that out, something like that? No, I actually. Where did I meet one of my former boyfriends? No, I met him on Zeus okay, you know what?
Speaker 2:I remember you discussing that and that was the one that it would like. You had to take pictures to verify that it was you. So no catfish like yeah proof, ish, whatever.
Speaker 1:Um, but I do remember plenty of fish, because plenty of oh you're right, plenty of fish was very similar to hinge. It had lots and lots of questions that would, they would ask you that, um, okay, let me, let me.
Speaker 1:Okay, I'm sorry. So plenty of fish is it would ask you a lot of questions and your other person couldn't see, could never see the questions or answers that you were asked. But, pof, plenty fish would know and they try to match you with somebody who they think you're compatible with based on those questions, whereas hinge gives you these really silly prompts that I, yeah, absolutely remember them silly and I couldn't take them seriously.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I really couldn't. I also didn't like that when I because I did. I remember creating my hinge profile and what are your thoughts on this, aj? What are your thoughts on this? So, no matter how many people try to say that Grindr's a dating app, I think we all know that it is a hookup app okay, can you agree with me on that?
Speaker 2:yeah, all right, for sure. Yeah, that's why you saw one more than the dating one good for you, love that for you.
Speaker 1:And then hinge or maybe even Tinder per se. You could say gear towards more date, more gear towards dating. What I didn't, what I found comical, was I could be in the same night literally laying on the sitting on my couch scrolling and come across a grinder profile. That's like come in door, open ass up, bust and leave, and then I'll see that exact same person on hinge, just like looking for love. I love that. You know what I mean. Looking for love, brain.
Speaker 1:I take things slow and I'm just like but also a fucks a fuck see, and that's me like I'm torn between the you're not me, you're contradicting yourselves or the fact that, well, you just want to fuck right now in the meantime might as well yeah, until you find that there's something wrong with them no, I just said I'm torn between it because I do flip back and forth on my thoughts, on my, on my views of it and and and why that shouldn't even be like a questionable thing my sex shaming yeah, okay, and and, and that's the thing I think that, like everyone could.
Speaker 2:That's that's why we have will and we're able to decide how we want to live our lives in that moment, and until we're we find that other person, I'm gonna slide it up, or whatever they're thinking, it's okay that they think that. You know what I mean. Some people do that, some people don't, some people are pure monogamy and they're gonna wait till the one and all of that. And there's other people that are I'm gonna, you know, have fun along the way and I, I, I kind of like that, I, I'm gonna have fun along the way and and if I'm having fun and then something sparks from that, then wow, that's weird, but surely not, you know oh, okay, yeah, I get it.
Speaker 1:I get it was. Was it? Was it you? I think it was you. I don't know if it was you or is it here that I was talking about. Like, one of the main reasons that I'm not as promiscuous as I portray myself to be is because of the parking situation in my apartment building, because of the one parking situation nobody means oh, my goodness, though was okay, all right.
Speaker 1:So one I do portray myself to be very, very promiscuous and, truth be told, I'm just not that promiscuous. I talk a big talk, but what I do think, control your faces. What I do think is honest on, honest, this is honest to God if the parking situation I always prefer to host first of all, let's put that out there.
Speaker 2:Oh, I see what you mean. Okay, now I get it.
Speaker 1:I always refer to host and my apartment building listener for you. You don't know. We don't have, you know, a call box where I can buzz somebody in, and we do have guest parking in our parking garage, but you still have to have a resident fob to get into the garage. So if I'm trying to have a simple, quick hookup, I now have to put on appropriate amount of clothes, walk out, meet them at the gate of the garage, let them drive up to the very top floor where the guest parking is, give them directions that come all the way back down to my floor and then escort them to my apartment and then, since every door in this damn building is bad, access a fob access. Once we're finished doing our deed, I then have to escort them all the way back to the garage. That's way too much to do.
Speaker 2:You know that sounds like a very first world problem.
Speaker 1:I never said it wasn't, and also.
Speaker 2:aside from that, it also sounds like I have money and I'm a gay and I like living in very secured areas that I need, so you just pulled yourself off of that. Listen, a lot of us live in buildings like that. However, there's a lot of people who don't, and a very select few that you know what I mean, Like have that privilege to have the gated community or the gated garage in a mid-right style building community in downtown and you're just pulling yourself out. Okay, listen, I'm not saying that's everyone's problem.
Speaker 1:The point that I'm making is, if I lived in a spot where I didn't require all of that, you'd be a bigger whore Ho straight ho, if someone could park and walk to my front door knock, knock a whole different person. Actually, you know what With you saying that 1,000% true, because the ho that I would be Exactly.
Speaker 2:I live, like my buildings, like fort fucking knocks and you cannot get in. And you know what? There is a call box here. However, the maze that they'd have to go through to get and the way it's numbered here make no sense whatsoever. I think the maze is a little bit more complicated and makes no sense whatsoever.
Speaker 1:My building is the only building. That's that way, every building across America. First number is the floor. Yeah, yeah, us, no. Second number is the floor. I've had Amazon delivery drivers the ones who don't take my dogs have been like sir, we're trying to get to the sixth floor. I'm like we don't have a sixth floor. He's like oh, it's 6321. I'm like, oh, but welcome to this building.
Speaker 2:Well, so, and here's the thing, and from someone who's in property management and very familiar with the way they number apartments, these idiots, and that's what I don't understand. If it were a typical, where you drive in through a gate and there's multiple buildings, the first number is gonna be the building number. The second number is gonna be the floor level, which is the way it is here. I don't understand how it's all one big building, but they numbered it differently, like it's multiple buildings. I don't get it.
Speaker 1:It doesn't make any sense Just because there's a fire door half way down the hallway shouldn't mean it's a new building.
Speaker 2:Right, yeah, very amusing.
Speaker 1:And not only that. I think I lived here for six months before I made it to the other side of the building. I feel like I was in a whole new world and they're like where am I?
Speaker 2:What courtyard is this? Literally, when I went to the swings in the back.
Speaker 1:Oh, they moved the pool.
Speaker 2:Yeah, the swings in the back like off of the river, like I'm just like oh, this is cute.
Speaker 1:Yes, actually funny story. I lived here for about maybe two or three months and I was running the river, but I had always started off the front of my apartment run around the building down the river.
Speaker 2:One day I went oh, that's a really cute building. It was my building. It was my building. I never seen it from the back.
Speaker 1:I love it. Never said that before, Anyways. So yeah, if I didn't have such security and whatnot, it would be a much bigger, much different story about my promiscuity. I love it, Say. Aj have you ever tried Raw?
Speaker 2:What's that?
Speaker 1:A new dating app.
Speaker 2:No, I haven't. What is it?
Speaker 1:Tell me about it, so you reminded me of it based on the whole Zeus can cat fishing thing. So you have heard of Be Real right.
Speaker 2:No, did you fall into that craze at all? No, what's up, you never fell into. Be Real. Okay, what is that?
Speaker 1:Be Real was a social media platform. Be Real was a social media platform. I don't believe you. Be Real was a social media platform. It took the country by storm. It peaked after a couple of months and then just dropped after that. Some people are on it. Be Real is you'd open the app and you have to take a photo and it uses your front and your back camera and it was one of those like there's no commenting and all this stuff. It was just take a photo of what you're doing in the moment with both your front and your back camera. So it's most real. No filters.
Speaker 2:I have never heard of that. Okay, yeah.
Speaker 1:No filters, no, nothing. And the funny thing is you get notifications to post to Be Real at any one per day, at any time during the day, and everybody on Be Real across the platform gets a notification at the exact same time, and then you have like three minutes. There are two or three minutes to post during that time in order for it to be real. Otherwise I'll tell you that you can do it later, but it'll tell everybody you posted it late, meaning that you try to find a better spot or better lighting or whatever.
Speaker 1:It was just a social media platform to try to get people to be more real. Raw dating is the same concept, so every day you open the app, you have to take a photo using your front and your back camera simultaneously and update it every single day. So it's trying to eliminate the catfishing and the fake profiles. No fake profiles.
Speaker 2:I'm confused. What do you mean? At the same like simultaneously.
Speaker 1:So what'll happen is the app, like if you open up Be Real, at one point when you open it up you will take a picture with your front camera and then three seconds later it takes a picture with your back camera, right On Raw, if I understand correctly. You open up the app, it'll show you on your main screen. You can just showing yourself, but on a little small, almost like FaceTime, it's showing the back camera at the same time.
Speaker 1:So it's, but it's gonna be of like the wall Right or wherever it is, if you're outdoors or free at work or whatever. I see okay, okay, and every day you open the app. So if it, happened right now.
Speaker 2:It would be like of me and then of you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, the main screen would be of you, since it's selfie, and then the smaller portion would be of me, since that's the back of it Exactly. That's interesting, and you have to every time you open up the app, or every day, once a day, you have to retake your photo.
Speaker 2:Okay, and it eliminates the fake profiles. So, and if I did it, if I logged in 10 times, that would be 10 different.
Speaker 1:I think it's once a day you have to update your photo.
Speaker 2:Oh, but I could still log in whenever and as long as I just upload, okay, so you're always getting updated people Cause I mean okay, when I was on Grindr. But hold on, is that a dating app or is that just like a social media? This is a dating app, okay.
Speaker 1:But it uses the same concept as be real to social media.
Speaker 2:I see Okay, now I get it.
Speaker 1:Now, not that I'm gonna download it, because it's a whole different story, but I think I'm just turned off from dating at the moment. But we can talk about that later. I see your face, I know.
Speaker 2:I have so many questions.
Speaker 1:I know, I know, but I find it very interesting because here's an example I was on Grindr in El Paso and somebody sent me a photo and the phone he was using had one single camera lens on the back of it. That's before the iPhone X.
Speaker 2:I'm not saying anything. I'm not going to say anything, but are you hearing what you're saying right now? Do you hear how you sound?
Speaker 1:Tell me oh, I'm no, no, no. What do you think? How are you interpreting what I'm saying?
Speaker 2:I'm just saying you sound so like I don't. It's superficial, the right word.
Speaker 1:No, see, okay, Materialistic. No, this is what you're not understanding.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:Old photo. Who has an iPhone X anymore oh, this is before the iPhone X An iPhone 8 or older.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:I don't even think that's supported anymore.
Speaker 2:Well, but also I mean, maybe it's a burner phone, maybe it's you know like, maybe it's a non-Apple. I mean, I don't know.
Speaker 1:I think you're being a little too optimistic. It's an old photo, is what it is. It is an old ass photo.
Speaker 2:Well, I mean, I just find that so hard to believe because I I always prefer current photos. So I always I've never looked hideous my entire life, so I'm always current on my photos. So that's why I just find it like not everyone does that. I'm just confused.
Speaker 1:So no, no, no, no, no, no. Okay, I could understand that Okay.
Speaker 2:I'll tell you something about using an old photo. Uh-huh, oh my God.
Speaker 1:Okay, I'm gonna put it down my, my nudes, only the close-up, like the one where it's just my dick and only my dick. That photo is like 15 years old.
Speaker 2:It hasn't changed it hasn't changed.
Speaker 1:Like it looks the same. It literally looks the exact same. I've compared, but it was a really good photo and I'm like well, why would I, it looks exactly the same.
Speaker 2:Okay, well, if it looks exactly the same and you compare, then something's different, something's wrong.
Speaker 1:No, obviously, if I'm taking photos photos that I have that are show more of my body, that has changed.
Speaker 2:Those are definitely more updated with my base, okay. But again this close-up something's changed. If it doesn't look the same, I know it's what. I'm not sure If if. I mean, if you do the same angle, if you do the same, whatever that close-up, or it's only your member, I had got a good angle. I'm saying I got a good angle.
Speaker 1:Okay, it was it was good, it was great. And actually I remember that one was that picture wasn't even trying to be like artistic or anything. I remember I was trying to take care of myself and one of my really good friends, danny, kept like texting me over and over and over and over again. So I got pissed and I snapped a picture and I sent him. I was like I'm trying to beat off, leave me alone. And that's how I got that picture. Yeah.
Speaker 2:Your penis looks different now. If it's from 15 years ago, Do we have to?
Speaker 1:do we have to do it before and after? I mean, yeah, it's gonna look the same.
Speaker 2:I don't. I think, maybe not it was from 2016.
Speaker 1:It's a little less than 15 years ago.
Speaker 2:Oh, okay, that kind of math.
Speaker 1:It was from 2016, January specifically.
Speaker 2:Okay, so it's in that less than 10 years. Is that math? Yeah, I don't know Something like that. Anyways, the point is.
Speaker 1:This is an old photo because it hasn't changed. So like one thing that I'm absolutely terrified of doing is inadvertently catfishing somebody. Whenever I do updating profile or grind or a hinge or a tender, I like it gives me anxiety. I will go through and find my best photos, but I mean we all know our good angles right.
Speaker 2:I know a poop bitch. Of course, of course. Have you seen my Instagram?
Speaker 1:I mean, I can make look like I have a narrow face chisel jaw that could cut glass. You know I could do that, but I know that that's not realistic.
Speaker 2:Have you seen, okay, and so one of my favorite things to do, like, if I do find someone interesting, okay, I peruse their social media stock and do well, not stock, I don't like using that word, but I do, you know inquire about it and check out their profile and then go to their tagged photos.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:And that Shows the truth. Shows the truth At least. Okay, not there, because people could also deny tagging and whatever, and if there's none I'm like no, exactly, and if there is some and they also look good, I'm still questioning, because also, those are the approved ones.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:Because that's how my profile is and you know. But also, like tagged photos are my go-to Like, that's how I'm like, okay, this is a real you. Which is why, honestly, on mine I'll have, like the occasional, like kerfuffled email, a kerfuffled photo of myself, because then it's like oh, then all of these are like his tagged and they're all like beautiful, except for like three.
Speaker 1:Oh, okay, hello. So people like you I should worry about Exactly.
Speaker 2:But also I'm I always get the oh wow, You're actually a lot prettier in person. Okay, yeah, See, and I'm like no, I know.
Speaker 1:And it would be terrifying to get the opposite. And that is, that is my, that's my, that's my, that's my issue. And so I will literally start a group chat with whoever my close friends are at that moment, because it changes, you know, very occasionally.
Speaker 2:And I'd be like all right.
Speaker 1:Here are 10 photos I need you guys to like. Up vote and down vote. We need to get it down to five.
Speaker 2:I haven't gotten any of those I need to know. Oh, that's good.
Speaker 1:Because you're a bitch AJ.
Speaker 2:Okay, well, do you want the honesty, or do you not?
Speaker 1:You're right, you're right.
Speaker 2:Listen, I'm Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait wait.
Speaker 1:Okay, go ahead please, and I will have them. I'll be like one. Does it look good? Right, I need a one to five. And how good it looks to, how true to life, is it Right?
Speaker 1:And that's my big thing. I need to. How good it looks and how true to life is it? Yeah, and I need to find those balance because one thing I do not want to happen is not that it's ever happened to me, but I've only heard of stories is like I show up somewhere and it's like or I see on profiles where they say if your photo changes when you get here, our plans will change.
Speaker 2:I don't get it.
Speaker 1:Say the moment like if your photo change, if your appearance changes when you arrive, our plans will change.
Speaker 2:Yeah Kind of thing.
Speaker 1:So I really try to be. You know I don't want to inadvertently cash cash somebody. So yeah, I try to send, updated from sending a body photo or a face shot or whatnot, but back when it came to my penis, it's never changed.
Speaker 2:Okay, listen. So okay, let's kind of talk about that and this whole catfishing thing. Maybe that's why I'm just kind of and again, I've been so removed from the dating scene that I just it just makes me like everything that could be possible Like, have I found people interesting? Yes, I have found some people interesting. However, I'm also one of those that you know just kind of like question everything. So, you know, I just I see so many of my friends who are in the whole dating arena just like kind of go through that shit and I'm like I am so glad that I'm not in that I will continue on this journey that I'm on and I will well, yeah sure, why not?
Speaker 2:It does seem kind of like oh you know like sometimes to how we're like I miss that. Or you know how it's intriguing. I have found solace in my friends and focusing on work or on keeping my mind busy, to where that miss missing isn't something that's gonna take over because I am so busy and focused on so many other different things and making sure that again, when that time comes, I'm able to be the best person that I can be for that other individual and who they deserve to get. And so I'm just in this whole journey and path of myself that, while I have found interest, seeing other people's situations that they go through, make me very not wanting to be there at any time soon.
Speaker 1:Anybody else's messy situations.
Speaker 2:And there's a lot of messy situations out there.
Speaker 1:I want to plug them.
Speaker 2:I am, if you're referring to a few of so. My friend actually has a podcast called messy situations and that was one of my inspirations to kind of get into this whole potting arena Right, and season two is going to be coming out very soon, by the way, and he's going to have a lot more stories and stuff coming. But, listener, if you are super into podcasts and love just hearing everyone else's problems to make your life feel better, go listen to messy situations. It's my friend Kane and his very good friend Michelle.
Speaker 1:Promo-Lego.
Speaker 2:She's amazing.
Speaker 1:I just binged it. Did I tell you that? No, yeah, so I travel a lot for work, and sometimes I fly, sometimes I drive, depending on how much equipment I have. Yeah, a lot of equipment this trip, so I drove seven and a half hours on the way back. I binge. I think I listened to about six episodes and I'm just like I am dying laughing.
Speaker 2:Did you hear the one with the Jason Biggs wife or something like that?
Speaker 1:Yes, Jennifer Moy? I don't remember that was hilarious, it was. I love Jason Biggs.
Speaker 2:Not only is he fucking up, American Pie PS, by the way, for these younger individuals. Not only is he hot, as shit, great actor.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think I know most from American Pie, and then he was in Orange's New Black.
Speaker 2:Oh, that's him.
Speaker 1:That's where I recognize him from the most.
Speaker 2:Okay, he's done a lot of stuff, though, okay.
Speaker 1:Yeah, His wife was a guest on, I think might have been the first of this current season.
Speaker 2:So I think there's only one season right now, but the first one then.
Speaker 1:Oh, of there's seconds, I believe, so Don't quote me, don't quote me, never, ever quote me actually.
Speaker 2:No, I know, I know I'm beginning, yeah, no, I don't.
Speaker 1:No, but guys listen to her. Go find messy situations. It's available for every listener podcast. It is great. There is a wide variety of talents on there. They are hilarious. They talk about the most absurd things and also the most down to earth things. We're talking affairs, smallpox, monkeypox, dating, dating apps like this, breakups, marriages, cheating, it is all of it.
Speaker 2:Every possible messy situation that you could think of. It's very good and it's very interesting All the different interviews that they get and they have, and every episode is completely different with different people and different interviewees or whatever.
Speaker 1:So it's really fun, that's so funny Right After you listen to ours, go listen to that, I know I was like wait a minute, plugging too much, no. But to get back to your dating thing. Yeah, and that's like what I said earlier, not that I'm off dating, but I definitely think I'm off dating from the apps. I think I'm even done trying to find hookups on the apps, aj.
Speaker 2:Really yeah.
Speaker 1:And I say that because one I have. What do they call it these days? A roster? Right, I have my roster. This sounds horrible, but I have my good old faithfuls.
Speaker 2:Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes yes.
Speaker 1:Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. I mean that's something I have seen my lately Walking Out and I'm in different social circles and meeting different people. My last handful of exescapades I've met them organically. You know what I mean. I've met them organically in person.
Speaker 2:So I really enjoyed that.
Speaker 1:So I think that I'm essentially going to be off. I think I might just retired at the dating. Soo not, obviously not forever.
Speaker 2:Do it now.
Speaker 1:I don't even, not even when traveling.
Speaker 2:Do it now. Yeah, give me your phone right now. No, for real. No, give me your phone right now.
Speaker 1:Honestly, god, if we weren't recording this video with this phone right here? I definitely would so, but you know, that would be a breath of fresh air for me. Just I don't need them. I don't need them at all.
Speaker 2:And I don't need to date anyone right now.
Speaker 1:So while you don't, need Well, you're already dating somebody Myself Exactly.
Speaker 2:No, I know On that. Note, date yourself and no one else. Happy holidays.
Speaker 1:imagine, no, no, but for real you know what AJ loves to hijack a sign-off.
Speaker 2:Me.
Speaker 1:Me Okay, not hijack. Aj loves to not hijack, I hijack sign-offs.
Speaker 2:You should do it.
Speaker 1:AJ loves to just out of nowhere drop a sign-off and I'm like I guess we're done.
Speaker 2:Oh my.
Speaker 1:God, but no, AJ, I think the next time we meet you will be have either during or have been back from your vacation.
Speaker 2:I fly out. I fly out Saturday morning at an insanely ungodly hour At an undisclosed time, sure. And I will be out of the country and I will return right before the end of the year, but I'm immediately getting whisked away to a new year celebration in a different city, so I don't think I'm not gonna see you till next year.
Speaker 1:Wow, that is so bittersweet. I am super excited for you.
Speaker 2:Thank you.
Speaker 1:So right here on the pod, you heard it from me first. Happy new year, AJ.
Speaker 2:Yay, thank you. Happy new year, james Awesome.
Speaker 1:And to you all, happy new year. Listeners, we love you, love your support and we'll see you next year.
Speaker 2:Bye, take care. Take care Run anlim Pour橋.
